Wednesday, February 15, 2012

hope.
i have hope.

i feel like lately i've been re-living a portion of my life that started back in may 2009.

it was then, when i started losing weight and getting healthy and fit. i started running, ran a half marathon and then a full marathon.  it was when i was training for my second marathon that i injured myself.  partial tear to my gluteus medius (muscle in hip). couldn't run for 3 months. it was a long road coming back. physical therapy and basically started from scratch running again. i swore to myself that i would not run in pain, that i would not get caught up in training for anything, and i would take it easy.  well, everything just flew out the window with the mention of a race.  Sure...sign up for the San Luis Obispo Marathon...sure, just pile on the miles, despite my feet and knee hurting.  what was i thinking??  what is wrong with me?? 

so here i am...back to where i started.  full circle.  trying to whittle off the weight i gained during the 3 months i was out with my hip injury.  basically starting over with my running AGAIN!  haven't run in 12 days. and not sure when i will be able to.  i went to the dr.  he did x-rays of my feet and found heel spurs in both.  MRI to come on the knee.  dr. wants to rule out a torn meniscus, but honestly, the knee is feeling better with just rest. 

even with the heel spurs i am able to ride the bike at the gym.  which is truly a life-saver...well, sanity-saver.  being able to sweat has really helped with my whole mindset.  i am able to keep a positive attitude and am able to continue losing weight.  i joined weight watchers again.  i just love the accountability and the motivation i get from being in a room of people who are struggling with the same thing i am. it's really comforting to know i am not alone.

i am trying to focus on what i am able to do, and not what i can't.  trying to stay positive.  i am able to ride the bike and that's what i'll continue to do.  i know that doing intervals, whether it be running or riding, with help with fat loss.  so that is what i'm doing.  being mindful of my thoughts, and taking them captive, and making them obedient to Christ.  letting my mind dwell on only things that are true, noble, right, pure, admirable, excellent and praiseworthy.  this is exactly what our bible study group is talking about right now. God's timing is amazing!  HE knows exactly what we need and when we need it.  HE is my comfort.  HE is my strength. HE is my hope.

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