Monday, August 22, 2005

sad today.

Today was the day that public school started in our area. It was a rough day for me but not because I was sad to be dropping my son off at his first grade classroom. I'm sad today because it has made me come to grips again that my son is different from most kids. We have always known R was different but with each passing year it is becoming more evident. We have begun the journey of evaluation; quite possibly leading to Asperger's. The beginning of public school today is just another reminder of how different he is. I'm worried that the world will not be kind & sympathetic to those differences. I know I cannot shield him from life, that would not help him, but I want him to learn and experience life on his terms and not be pushed into things until he is ready. That is why we have chosen to homeschool. This decision was not taken lightly and took us over a year. I am excited to be on our journey, but still have this ache in my heart and lump in my throat today.

One of my goals in life is to raise happy children. I want them to understand themselves; to know their strengths and weaknesses. I want them to be kind, generous, and sympathetic to others. I am trying to keep my eye on the bigger picture. What do I need to do to make sure that my kids are happy & productive human beings? I try to take each day as it comes and look for the positives. God has entrusted me to take care of three fabulous little people and help them to grow to be all they can be. I want to celebrate their uniqueness and if homeschooling is the way to do it, then this is my journey.

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